Friday, August 26, 2011

Flower Power Mom

Thanks to Sylvia for reading and responding to my post, "Anyone Who Wants To Be A Parent Can Be?"  It looks like they have a great program set up to educate and help women over 40 who are trying to become mothers.  Check it out!

FlowerPowerMom.com—The Truth About Motherhood After 40 (http://flowerpowermom.com/), features real mom stories, expert advice and the first online community to empower all women on the journey of motherhood after 40. A Child After 40 online offers support and free Ask Our Expert” educational forums on midlife motherhood—from fertility, ART, pregnancy, birth or adoption, to parenting after 40.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Anyone Who Wants To Be A Parent, Can Be?

During some of my online reading and research, this news story caught my attention.  Although I have lived in Idaho for the past year, my life up until then was spent in Utah.  Maybe that's why it hit close to home.

The current Mrs. Utah is a woman who has struggled with infertility and multiple miscarriages.  She has been able to give birth to two healthy children and has plans to continue fertility treatments to grow her family.  Part of her platform as Mrs. Utah is to educate the public about infertility, which I love.  She talks about her involvement with the Utah Fertility Center and how they are putting on seminars together to educate the public.

The part that rubs me the wrong way is at the end of the article where she says that "anyone who wants to be a parent can be".  There was no discussion at all about adoption or what happens if your health issues make it impossible to become pregnant, only about pursuing fertility treatments.  The fact remains that there are some people who will never get pregnant, no matter how hard they try.  And what about adoption?  Adoption has been an amazing way of having many, many, many children join their forever families.  Why not at least mention it as an option?

However, if you feel that adoption is not right for you, or if you are trying to adopt and haven't been successful, there are many cases where no matter how badly you want to be a parent, you aren't.  So, while I'm glad that Mrs. Utah is trying to bring awareness to infertility, I feel like her statement was wrong and possibly hurtful.  What do you think?

Monday, August 8, 2011

I Am Not My Body

I found this video about an amazing woman that I wanted to share with you.  Although she is not struggling with infertility, she is dealing with a severe trial of her own, and I felt her story resonate with me.  I love the part where she says, "I am not my body."

All too often, we allow our physical appearance or limitations to define who we are.  When I was struggling through infertility, that infiltrated every part of me.  I believed I wasn't as good as women who could get pregnant.  That there was something intrinsically wrong with me that had caused this.

The logical part of my brain told me that this wasn't true, but it took a lot of time and healing for my heart and mind to believe it.  That's one of the reasons I love this video.  She has learned something that is definitely worth sharing:  I Am Not My Body.

She also talks about her new feelings about motherhood.  Again, my heart was touched.  I have often told people that I don't think I love my children any more than any other mother, but I do think that I appreciate them more because of the long and painful journey it took to get them here.

The video closes with one of my favorite scriptures, that I have written about before.  What a great story about someone who is choosing happiness in the face of living a life that she never planned on.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?f​eature=player_detailpage&v=KHD​vxPjsm8E

Friday, August 5, 2011

Make Your Decision, And Then Make It Work

Grandpa taught me to make a decision, and then make it work.  About two years ago, my sister (who also has infertility issues) and her husband were considering adopting a sibling group of 4 children from foster care.  They had 2 children already, an eleven-year-old daughter she had given birth to, and a seven-year-old son who they adopted as an infant.  This sibling group consisted of a twelve-year-old girl, and three boys ages five, three, and two.

After much prayer and soul-searching, they felt like they were going to adopt them, but my sister called Grandpa to talk to him about it first.  He told her, "Well, it sounds like you have done everything you need to to make a good decision about this.  The best advice that I can give you is that once you make your decision, that is the end of it.  Then just get busy making it work."  They did adopt these four children and they are busy making their wonderful family work.

Not only is this great advice for adoption, it's great advice for life.  Now, I know as well as anybody, that our best laid plans are not always successful - no matter how hard we try to make them work.  But, when that happens, I believe that - although it is difficult - we can make the choice to move forward and seek healing and happiness anyway.  And once we make that choice, then we just need to get busy making it work.

Thanks, Grandpa, for these (and so many other) lessons that you have taught me.  Thank you for the life you have lived and the example you are to all those around you.  Thank you for your love and the legacy you have built.  A legacy that has nothing to do with earthly riches, and everything to do with serving, loving, working, and living.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Enjoy The Journey

Grandpa taught me to enjoy the journey.  According to my dad, Grandpa used to say something to the effect of, "I'm never lost.  I might be on a road I've never traveled before, but I'm never lost.  I'm just enjoying new scenery."  Grandpa's life is a perfect example of enjoying the journey.  Whether it has been traveling roads all over the United States, England, or Australia, or simply traveling along in the journey of life, Grandpa never takes a minute for granted. 

To this day, when he drives around with my dad, Grandpa has one rule.  If it's a road Grandpa hasn't been on before, Dad has to make sure he's awake to see it.  If there's a new baby in the family, Grandpa wants to hold him or her.  If there's a hug to give, Grandpa gives it.  If there's a moment to be enjoyed, Grandpa savors it.

Through all of the ups and downs in life, Grandpa has always found a way to enjoy the journey.

Monday, August 1, 2011

When Life is Hard, Keep Going

Grandpa taught me that when life is hard (and sometimes it will be) you just have to keep going.  When you live to be 102, (or 32 for that matter) you are going to face some hard times in life.  My grandpa was 20 years old when the United States plunged into The Great Depression.  He lived through it.  He has been a farmer, a rancher, a truck driver, and the owner of a small dairy freeze drive-in.  During his lifetime, he has lost his job, lost his farm, and lost children and grandchildren to death.  His dear wife of 50 years died about 22 years ago.  He has watched his children and grandchildren suffer from sickness, injury, disease, sadness, and heartache.  He has suffered from injury and illness himself.

Through all of this, I have never heard or seen Grandpa complain.  Don't get me wrong, I have watched him grieve.  I have watched him pray.  I have seen him correct.  I have heard him comfort.  But always, ALWAYS, I have watched him move forward with faith and love.